Four
years ago today, I attended the FIRST college entrance examination in my life,
because of some reasons, the result was not too good, so I had to decide to repeat one
year. In 2009 I once again into the entrance of the examination room. In
fact, more tension than the previous when began to write, I was silently telling myself:
everything would be OK...A month later, the result were better than last year
more or less, but still admitting not my dreaming score and university that
finally I was admitted by an unknown college in Shanghai (To tell you
the truth, I've always wanted to admitt the University of Shanghai) I have
regretted that I wasted of many time in high school...so I had to do a same
decision to continue to repeat again(this time my family, friends, teachers, all opposed)
but I still stubbornly stuck to my decision..Nobody ever know that I made the
two of the same decisions, how painful it was...repeat that for two years...I
seemed to isolated, no network, and almost no friends in those two years, as I took my own life to gambling, and the result was unknown..Two years, neither long nor short, but for me, that two years was the most painful in my life..Every day were reading, eating, sleeping, repeatedly doing the same thing.I still clearly remember,for repeat students, the score every exam for us was a big strike...But we really admired us(repeat students), at least we did not choose to jump from a building under that kind of pressure(or even repeat for two years for me), but what did it matter? Even if you die, the Earth is still turning, life has to go on, no one will sympathize with you...so...
However, I did not know how I spent that two
years, I could not help crying when metioned this...anyway... In 2009, our dorm have
four people (including me), almost every night you could hear clearly
someone hiding in the quilt for weeping,it's NORMAL!June 8, 2009 , for those of
us who was not happy, still we could cry strongly.. From 2009 to 2010, the last
time I decided to repeat (I've just said before) More painful than before, I wanted
to die at that time, but I always love and cherish my life..Huh, June 8, 2010, everything was
finally over. Later, September 2010, I came to an unknown college. . I accepted
my fate. .Yeah, I've always believed that what you wasted and you must be make
it up sooner or later! Now I only hope that God can take care of me more,
because I had make up for two years, and had lost my valuable time and
youth...
